Lives Intertwined

Posted on Fri Oct 30th, 2026 @ 7:58am by Lieutenant JG T'Lar & Lieutenant JG Jacob Rosen

2,229 words; about a 11 minute read

Mission: Character Development
Location: Counseling Office

It can be said oftentimes that one does not know that something was missing until it is there. So too had Jacob Rosen found that his cohabitation with the entrancing T'Lar had fit like a well worn in pair of boots. As if the first morning they prepared for their normal work days together he had looked into her eyes across the bedroom and felt something akin to Ah, there you are .

It was in the small moments; the slight upturn of the corner of her lips as Jacob placed a steaming mug of her spiced tea as the Vulcan woman poured over notes from her daily sessions. The brush of a single finger against his own as T'Lar left for the day, filling him with a warmth that spread like a cozy blanket from his head to his toes. The scent of her hair lingering on her pillow as he awoke to her rising early to perform her meditation.

The Operations side of the repairs was stressful to say the least. Jacob had worked long hours sorting out the supply chain for non-replicable components, of which an Akira class had many. He had held a meeting with his department telling them in no uncertain terms that Sunfire's repairs would not be held up on their account. The Engineering section would not be found waiting on Ops to deliver a part, to coordinate power, to run a cable when need be. More nights than he'd like resulted in Jacob returning to their quarters well into the later hours.

There was a thought. Their quarters. Jacob found that he no longer felt they belonged to him alone. He wondered to himself when that change had taken place and was unable to find a time. Jacob's heart raced as he considered the possibility that T'Lar did not share this. Would she prefer to return to her own space? Surely she would have told him... right?

Jacob looked up, around the Ops office at his department. Gonzo and Lammon had erected a small ping pong net in the middle of their conference table and had begun to play a match. He stood, straightening his uniform jacket before giving a quick notice over his shoulder. "Need to go take care of something. Let me know if you need me."

His feet carried him without regard for second guessing on account of his mind. In minutes he was through the turbolift, down the corridor and pressing the chime outside T'Lar's office.

T'Lar looked up from the PADD she was perusing at the sound of the door hail. She consulted the chronometer briefly. It was still well over forty five minutes before her next appointment. Puzzled, she answered.
"Come in."

Jacob entered and she immediately took note of his elevated heart rate, detectable to her keen Vulcan vision observing the veins of his neck.

"Jacob," she said pleasantly," this is an agreeable surprise. Is everything alright? You seem... flustered."

"I know you are busy so I won't take much of your time." Jacob replied, closing the distance, sitting across from her leaning forward in the chair. Staring into T'Lar's eyes finding them analytical but not judgmental. "I felt that if I did not come down right now, and talk to you, right now. Well I'd regret it." He gave a nervous smirk. "I'm done living with regret."

T'Lar was taken aback momentarily by his nervous intensity.
"Whatever it is, Jacob, I am sure we can work it out." She said encouragingly. "What is this about?"

"I want you to stay Love." Jacob said, voice with equal parts resolve and nerves. "I understand if you prefer your own space, I will rearrange our quarters to do so but I don't want to rise in the morning or lay down at night without you there. Please, tell me to go back to Operations and to slate your repaired quarters for reassignment."

"Ahhh. This is about our living arrangements. Coincidentally I was meaning to speak with you about them tonight during dinner." the Vulcan answered with a raised eyebrow. "I find that my thoughts and feelings are very much aligned with yours in this matter regarding our continued cohabitation. I too would find your absence not only conspicuous were I to move back into my old quarters, but I feel it would have a negative impact on my well being given the strength of our psychic bonding. As it is you occupy a great deal of my thoughts during the day and I find myself looking forward to the times when we are able to be together once more." She paused for a moment and reached out and took his hand.
"Very well, you have my permission to put my quarters up for reassignment and formalize our living arrangements with the quartermaster. I will begin moving the remainder of my things as soon as I get off shift."

In Starfleet, very often Starfleet Officers did not have the luxury of tomorrow. There was only the now, the present. Jacob had lived for a time with that mindset. It had worked for him, to focus on the journey and not the destination. To live life with no expectations was healthy he told himself. Living with T'Lar a thought had begun to worm it's way into his mind and through his heart. The future. He sheepishly imagined a future with her and found a desire that was increasingly more difficult to ignore. Jacob wanted her today, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow. In his private moments where he awoke in the middle of the night, the woman he loved so fiercely and tenderly in his arms. In those eerie hours when the ship was quiet around them, Jacob dared to envision a future of their elderly shapes, a long life well lived. Together.

"I have been thinking about your counterpart and what she told us. Perhaps we find and choose each other more often than not. I love you T'Lar."

"Perhaps we are quantumly entangled on an emotional level." T'Lar gave a small upturn of the corner of her mouth.
"I love you as well, Jacob and I am deeply gratified to be taking this next step in our relationship with you... I..."

T'Lar stopped cold as the lights flickered in the room and suddenly behind Jacob appeared the battered and bloodied form of her dead fiance' Brian Kernan. She stumbled back out of her chair, hand over her mouth to stifle a scream.

"T'Lar?" Jacob, voice concerned, said as he crossed to help.

"How quickly you have forgotten me, T'Lar..." Brian's apparition moaned

"That's not true. You told me to release you, and I did. You were at peace finally... This is not real! You are not here!" T'Lar said defiantly

"T'Lar, you're safe, you're alright." Jacob said, placing his hand on her forearm gently.

The lights flickered again and just as suddenly as he appeared, Brian Kernan vanished. Her PTSD fully triggered, T'Lar flew into Jacob's arms and held him tightly.

He held her close, making small circles on her back slowly with his palm. Jacob waited for her to explain at her own pace.

"I saw Brian, standing behind you, just as he was the day he died. He accused me of forgetting him." She said.

Jacob's eye softened as he returned T'Lar's gaze. "I apologize if my sudden appearance and declaration triggered something T'Lar. It was not my intention."

"I don't know what caused this hallucination but it was very real... Jacob, there is something I need to tell you about Brian." She offered cautiously

"Whatever you need T'Lar. Please tell me what I can do." Jacob said, holding her hands in his.

T'Lar sat heavily in her chair and motioned for Jacob to take a seat as well.

"What do you believe about an afterlife. About the souls of those that die?" T'Lar asked cautiously.

"Well." Jacob exhaled, scratching the back of his head thoughtfully before continuing. "I have always supposed or hoped perhaps that we are reunited with those we loved and who loved us." He smiled sheepishly. "My parents are a bit more religious than I, and well I never paid the closest attention on Shabbos."

"As a Vulcan, my people believe in something called the katra, which is the equivalent to the human concept of a soul. We have special ceremonies in which these Katras can be transferred via mind meld into special receptacles known as vre'katras, thereby storing the wisdom and memories of the departed which can be accessed again by individuals through mind melds with the vre'katra. In some extreme circumstances a person who is dying can transfer their katra into the consciousness of another via mind meld until such a time as that person can perform a ritual to transfer the katra into a vre'katra." T'Lar paused to let that sink in.

"That is fascinating." Jacob replied, allowing her to continue.

"When Brian was dying, he became unresponsive and I, out of desperation, performed a mind meld on him to try to bring him back. What happened could not have been foreseen, but I went too deep and somehow transferred his consciousness into my mind as he died. It never occurred to me that a human being could possess a katra in the same manner as a Vulcan, and when I realized what I had done I was horrified. Brian had his own beliefs about the afterlife, and here I had kidnapped his soul and prevented him from passing on as he expected to. He was distraught which greatly disturbed me psychologically as well. Compounding the problem was the fact that I dared not confess to anyone what I had done for being labeled a deviant or a heretic and being shunned. I lived with his voice in my head, doing my best to make peace with him and comfort him in his dismay. Eventually I constructed a Vre'Katra in his likeness and performed the katric transfer ritual in secret. It was successful, or so I thought, though there were times when he was still able to manifest his presence in my thoughts." She said

Jacob's eyes softened as he held the woman in his arms. Grief was a concept containing layer upon layer of differing emotions, he knew that well. However, what T'Lar revealed about her culture and abilities made him realize how alone she must have felt shouldering that more intense burden.

"After I met you, something changed. It had been five years since his death and Brian became insistent that I should move on with my life. So I took his Vre'Katra and gave it to his parents and I was under the impression that he could be at peace now. But he's never manifested himself to me the way he did here just now, and I do not believe that this was anything more than a projection of some deep seeded insecurities that I am apparently still holding onto, despite my desire to move on and be fully present in my relationship with you." T'Lar confided.

"T'Lar." Jacob replied softly. "You do not need to push your past away for me. I want to support you, and your experiences have shaped who you are."

"I want to be clear. I do not believe that you triggered anything, Jacob. This was a completely spontaneous hallucination that I have no explanation for. I do not believe it to be related to Brian at all, but rather as I said, some sort of manifestation of an internalized insecurity related to my willingness to finally allow myself to move on while still honoring his memory." T'Lar stated.
"Nonetheless, I believe I should report to sickbay for a cranial scan to rule out any sort of medical explanation for what I experienced. I just need to postpone my next appointment..."
She picked up her PADD and fired off a message to the individual slated to be next on her counseling schedule informing them that she would have to reschedule due to an unforeseen medical situation.

"I understand." Jacob said, rising to his feet as he offered her his hand to help her up. Not that he felt she [i]needed[/i] it, but that he was there to help regardless. "May I accompany you to sickbay? Gonzalez will ping me if I'm needed."

"Of course. I would appreciate your presence in case I begin hallucinating again..." She answered.

He followed her out and down the corridor, allowing her to go ahead in spots where they were unable to walk side by side and had to let another crewmember going in the opposite direction pass. Jacob picked up on her nonverbal cues, the slight pause in her pace to allow him to catch up or the way her brows lifted ever so slightly as they strode past the poorly delivered punch line between friends.

"T'Lar?" Jacob said, barely brushing a shoulder against her's as they rounded a corner.

"Yes, Jacob?" T'Lar asked.

"Thank you."

"Thank you for listening and withholding judgement. You cannot imagine how hard it has been for me keeping this secret all of these years. You are the only person I have ever confided in enough to tell it. Ah, here we are." She said as they arrived outside of Sickbay.

TBC

 

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